I am sitting here deciphering what I should do with the rest of my day. School finished very early, like two hours ago but I was a twit and wasted my time away on, I don’t even know what. I looked at the stars, in the middle of the day.
I am thinking, should I call one of my my best friends, M, and tell her that I finally have free time, a free weekend and meet up with her, or go to her place. I know that would be one of her suggestions. I know a normal person with a simple brain wouldn’t think twice about it and go for it, it’s always fun to hang out with friends. But naturally, my mind drifted further from that.
Why is it that most of the time, Middle school and Junior High friends don’t count? I mean not that they don’t count, but why does every grown up I meet tell me that High School friends are the friends that may stay as you get older, even after it’s finished. Why? Why do we drift apart?
Why. Because people find new people, new envirement, new priorities, just over all change.
I understand that people just grow apart, I understand that concept. Nothing special has to happen or drastic between two people for them to just not glue together anymore. But why do people have to change themselves when a change of envirement occurs? I don’t change. At least I think I don’t. I feel like I didn’t. Have I changed? Now there’s food for thought. I’m gonna ask my K and M for their opinions.
Maybe in the slightest shades but I didn’t change who I am, how I dress, how I talk, how I think, most importantly.
I think it all comes from training your brain. Honestly. We are taught by our parents the most important basic things. How to act in public, to say good day, good evening, to be polite in someone else’s house, not to talk while your mouth is full, especially in company. Manners. But throughout Middle school and after you are also taught, some by words, some by experience and some by the two combined, that you should not be easily influenced. I hate that concept. Influence, in ways I think are negative. We all go through various friendship phases and at least 20 BFF’s are changed throughout school until you find your match.
And each phase is maybe a lesson, what to do, what not to do. We also make our own mistakes.
One of those things has to be, you should not be influenced by other people to do things you are not comfortable doing just because they are new, popular, trendy and most importantly, because everyone does it. **(I think I may have ranted on a little bit in the blog post. I just want to add that this is the main point of the blog post. I am not talking about pure change as it is, change is actually healthy. There is no way you can stay the same forever. And yes, I know confidence follows up with this. Some people are just too insecure about not fitting in and that’s fine as well. Make a mistkake, once or twice, we all do and we all learn. But if you do learn, you’ll see there is abslutely no one better than you yourself.
Don’t compare yourself with other’s and make the change according to them. That’s what I am saying)***
For sure. Every class has a popular train and someone in the class secretly wishes they were on it.
I don’t see the point in those types of changes. It might be ignorant of me to state that. I do understand change, but not because someone told you your way of doing something isn’t right because it’s not very common. Let’s add- among teenagers.
I may be a bit different on that part though. I have experienced some things in my ”younger youth” that not everyone has and I started growing up in my mind a bit faster. It worked a little faster than other’s.
If you managed to form an opinion about something, if you found your character by the slightest, you should not break it. In my opinion. I don’t change the way I talk, even though everyone around me talks differently. I don’t pick up the ‘slang’. Or walk differently, or state things I don’t believe in just to communicate better in a group of people talking around me. I refuse too. I at least can control it. If I see someone doing it, I don’t feel the need to do it myself. I talk and dress the way I talk and dress.
I know many people say that High School is the time of a teenager’s life where they just start growing and finding out who they really are and how they want to act. But I don’t think that’s true in some ways.
Most people start smoking for instance in high school. That’s not a part of you as a person. You either do it because you want to, but why would you actually want to unless it’s because of mental influence by friends. You know, you look at everyone doing it and you feel left out or something. Or you are actually influenced by words that you should do it and that you’re un cool for refusing to smoke. I don’t believe that people start smoking because they want to relieve stress. That’s just stupid. If anything, it enhances the stress after awhile.
I’m not aiming so much that my best friends made these kind of changes, I’m aiming that they have changed. M more, in some ways I have mentioned. Which is okay, but it is a change due to her invirement and people around her. She doesn’t mind it yet, nor do I but you can see how it escalated to this post.
Even if you want to change, it should be in your own time, your own pace, spontaneous.
You wake up and you decide to have a tattoo, that’s absolutely okay. That’s a personal choice. But you should never think less of yourself because you don’t do things everyone else does.
If you feel strongly about something that you do, or something that you don’t do, you have your reason for doing or not doing it. Stand by it.
If you learned something new and compromised, that’s amazing.
But don’t let other’s change your mind for you. High school or a certain age do not guarantee anything.