Happy Halloween!

Why hello there, we haven’t chatted in awhile. Tonight’s chat won’t be long. An update on my absence (this time with real troubles happening and complications) will come tomorrow after I’ve finished my duties at the doctors and such.

Just wanted to wish you all a Happy Halloween! May the spooks be with you.

I’ll be spending Halloween in the comfort of my bed, feeling like a dead kitty.
I leave you all with a good bye.


Things That Make Me Happy

I know that people say happiness comes in small measures. Which is true! The small things matter the most and leave lasting emotions.

But I fear that what my list will consist off will not be such small, simple things. I didn’t actually think this through or plan it, so I’m just going with the post and the tips of my fingers.
And imagine, chocolate is not one of them. Oh my goodness gracionious.

  • My kitties. Animals in general really. They make me way too happy and I am never lonely with them near me. I look at them and obeserve them, how they walk, how they move, their level of curiousity is astonishing. They are so cute and cuddly and they purr so nicely, it’s heaven on earth.
  • Piles of books. Oh my gosh! I think most of us judge books by their covers. The prettier, fancier and more glittery it looks, even if the title is something that does not interest you at all, I’m sure you all crave it. Or at least roll it around in your hands, thinking how great it would be if you sat down and actually read a freaking book. I always do when I’m in a dry streak.
    I always imagine my perfect moment I described once, on a cold winters day, sitting in my little office with hot tea or hot chocolate and I’m cozied up in my big chair with big shelfs and book cases FILLED with books.
    Belle’s library! In the castle! I know all bookworms thought, ”I want that in my house”. It makes me happy to see. It makes me appreciate books more and knowledge. If there’s any way you can learn something, it’s through books.
  • Buying notebooks, lots of notebooks, pencils, pens, markers, erasers, sharpenders, check books, daybooks. Supplies. I have no idea why but it has a shine to it like big piles of books. I just love having nice, big notebooks around. I try not to use them for rubbish ’cause many we’re thrown out due to my poor usage of them. Such a shame. But I’ve improved and since my writing in them got a lot more frequent, they’re certainly filled up. I feel like a ton of pens and fun colored markers all put in one of those containers makes a desk look that much more cool and it inspires me.
    Actually yes, I realized that right now. It inspires me. That’s what I’m aiming for with my (possibly, hopefully) future office. I want to feel inspired when I walk through the door. When I see notebooks and pens, my mind instatly goes ”Hm, so beautiful. I wanna write… What should I write about”, and tons of ideas flutter around my head like stars or birds.
  • Vanilla ice cream. Not chocolate, vanilla. It’s a sweet taste of heaven itself.
  • Those late night, nicely arguemented discussions about something I and that person feel passionate about. Those brain-teasers and food for thought discussions where there’s no true end. The discussion can go on forever because we have so many things to say and as time flies more and more thoughts and opinions build up and it’s just a wonderful time! These are exceptional talks because you don’t have the privilege of having them with  just anyone. It takes two understanding, wise and open-minded souls to listen & actually try to absorb what the person is suggesting and maybe let it grow.
  • Glass figures. They’re rich and beautiful. Oh… I just got an idea for a seperate shelf for my house in the future. Heheheh. Now I’m excited. Maybe not an entire shelf, but here and there, you know? To brighten up the place. I don’t like  chandeliers thou. They scare me. I feel like they’re going to fall over me any flipping second. Plus if you’ve watched the movie War Of The Roses, those two started with a chandelier life and died on a chandelier. It’s scary stuff. Such a morbid film really.
    Look at this little bundle of beauty.

    Have you noticed how everything in my life somehow revolves around cats and 65% of the time, all of my examples are cat related. It’s concerning.

That’s all I can really come up with off the top of my head. There’s a million more smaller and simpler things than this. A shinning, live day makes me happy. When I walk out and I feel free and breath in the fresh air. Good energy, positivity. Best way to start a day off, I’m sure. I could go into detail and I probably should’ve but it would be trying too hard in my case.

I wish I truly believed in everything I constantly say to people about positivity and happiness. That famous quote:

Even though I can’t practice these particular thoughts on myself, I want you guys to be happy and embrace even the smallest things that make you happy. Make them happen more often.
I guess happiness is a choice? Choose to be happy and LAUGH/smile more.
If there’s one thing I love and believe truly helps, it’s laughter.

You’re the most beautiful when you smile. 🙂

Here It Comes Again…

I’m sorry!!!

I don’t even know how many days I have been away. But remember the internet problem my mom had I think two weeks ago?That problem is STILL not solved.
Well first of all, I had nothing interesting to share with you guys apart from my hung kitties. OhOh! I bought something else that I will share soon! – But, other than that, I had nothing to write about and the weekend came along a lot faster than I thought it was going to. Before I knew it, I wasn’t able to write at all.
I just came back home and my blog was the first thing I checked.

I’ll be catching up now with all of your guys’s posts and comments. I missed all of you!
On a side note! I have been complaining to my father for WEEKS now how my freaking blowdrier broke. It over heated or something and I had no blowdrier for over a month. It’s humongously annoying because for someone with long hair, I don’t always have time to schedule my showers only when I have at least 5 hours free after for it to dry naturally.
Plus my hair looks like sh*t when it’s not blowdried properly. I’m sure my girls can relate to that. But finally I have bought it and along that… In the same store… we/my dad bought me a new flipping tv!!

I wish I could show you guys (I will fairly soon, everything) right now but my camera is being used by my guests. Yes, I have guests right now tormenting my cats. ._. They’re fascinated with them and with their number.
And don’t you just hate when a farther relative comes to town or your parent’s coleagues from work-or just someone that hasn’t seen you in a long time appears on an event or party and they go: ”Oh my god! It’s you! Oh my goodness I would have never recognized you! My, have you grown! Hasn’t she grown!? She has grown! You turned into a real beauty. My goodness!”.

I mean, I don’t mind the compliments and all but do you have to use that sqeaky voice and go on for the next 10 minutes. Plus, I’m not that amusing to see. After a short- or long period of time.

I’m gonna start catching up!

I Hung My Kitties

I hope what the title sounds like isn’t what went through your mind when you read it. That would just be insane. What I mean, is some mildly amateur art!
And technically it’s not art, it’s stickers. Are they stickers?…What are they? Wall art I guess? Why don’t I just show you.

They’re like cushiony texture with glue on the back and you glue them on. Once they’re on, they’re on. I’ve had them sitting in the depths of my room for awhile now, just trying to figure out where to put them and should I put them. There are plenty of other patterns. I know mom bought a stary night pattern, with basically a bunch of shinny glittery stars with a flying Tinker Bell. Her and her colleague put it up on the wall in their office. It’s really pretty.
They were creative and made it seem like Tinker Bell is flying away and leaving dusty stars as she passes.

I intend to buy more of these. I wish more hearts came with the package but I think it looks nice! You can see it right when you walk in the room. The fun part is my cat’s are really intrigued with them. Thankfully, they can’t reach them even when they jump, that was the plan. Otherwise I can say ta-ta to them.
However, they do tend to sit down on my bed and stare at them.

Basically. It isn’t much, but I love cats and any new little scrappy thing I can add that makes me think of them more is gold.
I hope you guys are having a wonderful day! 🙂

Knowledge Is Power

I am terrified to post this but yet feel so firmly about it. It is something I have wanted to mention awhile back but even if I wrote the post out, checked it a number of times, I ended up deleting it or. Or drafting it, but eventually it ended up in the trash.
Why? It’s a very sensitive topic that I think requires a great deal of thought before the mouth and tongue start swishing.
I found a way to do what I want to do, without doing it. I strongly apologize to anyone that get’s offended but please have an open mind. It is not my intention to hurt anyone or make them feel like they need to justify themselves to me in the comments or anywhere. You have the freedom of choice.

What I’m talking about is animal abuse, and veganism/vegetarianism creeps in. I am no expert on anything and much less on this peculiar topic and nor is Kalel, mind you. I say Kalel because the following text I am going to share with you is rightfully hers. Everything she has written, is her own true, blunt passion for helping animals.
Due to wanting too avoid the risk of saying something hurtful or offending, while Kalel has made such a marvelous job at avoiding it already, I am just going to leave a link: Knowledge Is Power and copy paste the crutial things I agree with but want to state.
If you wish not to read Kalel’s post due to it being rather long but are curious as to what I am reffering too, please read carefully and with understanding.
Just trying to build awareness and maybe inspire you. 

I strongly believe that everyone has the choice to do what they want in life. However, I also believe that everyone should be AWARE of what they take part in. Let’s face it- we are IGNORANT creatures. ALL OF US. We think we know everything, when in reality we know jack shit. Sometimes we need to expand our mind and let the idea of something new come in, swish it around, then spit it back out if necessary… but allow it the chance to possibly absorb, or grow.

HEALTH. I understand that this isn’t exactly a well-known fact, because most people don’t follow health studies posted on the internet, but consuming meat/dairy IS causing disease. Please, research for yourself, google “Harvard Meat Study” and there will be a plethora of articles about heart disease and various cancers. Meat/dairy is loaded with cholesterol and the high-meat/high-dairy diet that the average person has today, IS killing them. Heart-disease, to be exact. Heart-disease kills more people than ANYTHING else in this world (followed up by cancer, which also has MANY studies linking it to meat/dairy-consumption), 17.5 million just last year. This has nothing to do with added growth hormones/GMOs, we are talking STRICTLY cholesterol. (My own added note:Please realize that she is not blaming only meat/dairy products for mentioned diseases. Many other causes  exist next to them, but they ARE a factor).

INNOCENT LIVES. WHY KILL SOMETHING THAT YOU DON’T NEED TO SURVIVE? Doesn’t that seem a bit selfish? Do you think your life is of greater value than these creatures? Do you think that you are SO FAR superior over them that you can control their entire, miserable lives just for your burger? They may not speak our language, carry cell-phones or be creating the next Empire State Building, but that DOES NOT mean that they are not intelligent, compassionate creatures who deserve respect.

-I respect religion and I understand it. However, if you think God would be ok with his creations being held captive for a year and brutally tortured, just for your burger… you’re wrong. Animals were meant to live free, not in a tiny crate. There is nothing natural about what’s happening. There is nothing NATURAL about cows being forcefully impregnated their entire life to produce milk for you. For them to be standing all day, in an area too small to even turn their body, hooked up to a pumping machine. (My own added note: Watch ”If Slaughterhouses Had Glass Walls” video on YouTube for proof of how a BIG AMOUNT of animals are treated in America. Just one example. (It’s age-restricted and for a good reason)). Things have changed since the biblical times, and it is NOT NATURAL.

-The circle of life is when a lion eats a gazelle. That lion NEEDS that meat to survive. That lion is only killing that gazelle because its instinct tells it to. And if you want to talk about the “food chain”, guess what? We are FAR from the top of the food chain. With that mentality, guess we should just feed ourselves to the bears, gorillas, and wild cats, because, THEY are the top of the food chain. If you’re going to use science to back up your nature as a meat-eater, you can’t include weapons. We are talking man vs wild-animal. And man loses.

-Yes, cavemen ate meat. But why does that translate to “we are meant to eat meat”? Evolution does not mean destiny.

-I have saved my biggest pet peeve for last. Almost ANY time I mention animal equality or veganism, I get people who say “What about the starving children in Africa?”, “What about this, what about that?”.There are MILLIONS of problems in this world.
And I think this issue is close to my heart because the animals are VOICELESS. Not many people will care about them or fight for them. They are prisoners. It hurts me deeply because I see animals as equals. I know that may shock some people, because most people find humans to be superior. But I view a life as a life. I see videos of those animals being tortured and killed and it affects me as much as it would if they were replaced with humans.

Side note- I’m going to ask you to REALLY dig deep on this one. So open in your mind in preparation for what I’m about to say. WHY are humans more important than animals? Did you know that humans have done NOTHING but destroy this planet? That “animals” have been around LONG before humans (we’re talking scientific proof here, not biblical) and that this planet belonged to them before we swooped in and claimed it as ours. Did you know that EVERY single creature contributes to the eco-system that keeps our planet thriving and working, with the ONE exception of the human?? We contribute NOTHING. We only destroy. We are a virus. So why do we think we are more important? We are self-righteous creatures and we are disgusting. No life is more important than another. All life is important and should be respected. Even wild meat-eaters (a mere 25% of the animal kingdom) are respectful of the life they take. Humans are not. 

There is SO MUCH but this is where I will draw MY line, even though 99% of what she said, I say YES.
I truly hope to whoever went through this, understands that I am only spreading awareness. I also suggest to watch the documentary Earthlings. It is an eye-opener. You can find it anywhere, even on youtube.
If you know about all of this and feel bad for the animals but choose to eat meat, that’s your choice, your life. You do not need to feel shame for it, but believe me, change will be made.
The biggest changes take time and effort!
You do you in the mean time! ❤

I realize how horrible the quotations look absolutely awful on the original site. I can’t do anything about it.

I’m Along For The Ride

I did not expect that I would be writing this post today. I had a very very fun, exciting post I was going to write because I had no school today, I had a tiny little session of Block practice. I was going to be, life is good, the sun is shinning, all we need are birds humming. But I don’t think that’s going to happen.
I hope you guys are not bored by my ”venting” posts that are kind of depressing most of the times. People don’t want to be reminded of how wrong and ignorant our society can be and IS, I realize that. You want to be happy and think about happy things that make you smile and laugh throughout the day and that’s perfectly okay.

But, I wanna talk about something that’s extremely important to me and it revolves around life itself. And It’s probably not my place to even mention such things, especially with an older crowd I feel that I have for some reason. But it’s healthy to talk through your thoughts, especially at my age because we tend to misinterpert a lot of things and not understand. By we, I mean teenagers and young adults. It’s probably going to be a long post so I totally understand if you wish not to read this.

I watch and follow WULAS. What is that? That’s a channel on YouTube of two companions, Kalel and Anthony, I may have mentioned them before. If you know Smosh, you know Anthony. At first, I have liked their channel from the beginning because Kalel inspired me. I don’t have the words to describe this woman because she is very complex, yet very very simple. How I like to think of myself. I’ve seen common grounds between her and I and I love it.
She made a seperate channel, KalelKitten on which she uploaded her very first video. That channel is going to be a reflection of her and her thoughts and opinions.
I am going to link it, if you care to watch.
It’s not an hour long, boring and suffocating lecture about life and a tiny portion of it’s lesson’s. Just her with her thoughts, sharing it with us. What she learned.

I wanna talk about some things she said.
Most people who know me in real life, be it my mom, friends, teachers, my parent’s colleagues at work, say I am a very bright and intelligent kid and that I understand things a kid my age shouldn’t bother with. Because it’s too far away from me. I know that I think too much about things that can only be learned through time and understood with age, but I don’t like to leave it at that.
Of course, I sometimes feel like I’ve got the world and the people around me figured out. Like I know everything about everyone. I know that’s far from being true obviously.
But I do like to think that I understand quite a bit. It’s hard for me to talk about it because they are sensitive subjects and most of the time, people write me off as someone who knows nothing because I can’t express it easily in real life. I just can’t get my 10 minutes to compile all of my thoughts and share what I know and how I feel. That’s why I write.

There’s a few things I want to mark out from her video and those are:

  • Appreciating all of the things that you have and being grateful for it.
    Something that I have heard my entire life, whether it be people or even commercials on TV. I don’t know how to do this. Actually scratch that, I know how to do it but I can’t do it all the time.  I really can’t. It’s not a matter of not wanting too. I guess this is one of those things where I need age and a lot of experience behind my tush in order to understand and acknowledge.  I can’t do this if the majority of my surroundings are not already fine. They don’t have to be perfect or amazing or even great, but I need them to be fine.
    I am a very sensitive person by heart yet very strong. My past is a factor of that sensitive and soft side. I do not deal well with failure yet and that is something I also need to learn. In time.
    I know it’s the little things. I understand that.
    I should be grateful I was able to wake up this morning, for being healthy, for having a home and having enough money in my family for the neccesities we all need, that I’m getting an education etc. I understand this and I’m not saying it’s nothing. It’s a big something. But when even waking up feels like a pain and there’s no use for me getting out of my bed, it’s not so easy to look on the bright side of things.
  • Have self control and self-restrainct not to insult and talk sh*t about someone (On the internet as well). 
    This is something I STRONGLY stand by. Cyber bullying in general. I have been through it and it has made my life a living hell for a period of time.
    We all pass judgement, a lot. It’s how human’s work, it’s in our nature to look at someone on the street and judge them in our minds. What they are wearing, if we like the colour, the design, their legins, shoes, hair, face. Whatever it may be.
    But you don’t walk towards that person/stranger on the street and feel compelled to share your opinion about everything you were judging? No, you keep that thought to yourself and that is exactly what you should and what you’re supposed to do. Your thoughts, may be hurtful towards someone. Approaching that stranger would mean you’re approaching them with the intent of hurting them. No one should ever do that and no one deserves that.
    We have the ability to shut up and only observe for a reason. Keep your judgement to yourself if you can and if it’s not crutial for you to state your opinion. Especially if you know it would be hurtful.
    You absolutely have a right to have an opinion, but you also realize that the other side also does. They also have a right to dress the way they want, listen to what they want and have opinion which they think is right.
    Again I mention this sentence: No matter what religion, race or colour, you do not have any higher or miner rights than from someone who is the opposite of you.
  • Allow someone to move on with their life, allow them to grow from their mistakes. Don’t hold it against them if they show true remorse. It’s not fair. 
    In this part of  her video, she made me cry. Not because of what she said, but what the message is representing. It’ll haunt me for a very long time. It’s a lesson I have learned and it cuts my heart in half to know that I’ll hopefully-not-but-most-likely make this mistake again with someone. It hurts me because as of now, it’s the worst thing I’ve ever done and it made me ‘lose’  A LOT.
    It’s not fair. There is nothing worse than being dragged down. Especially if that someone is trying their FU*KING BEST to make up for it. You need to appreciate that. Everybody makes mistakes. Some are bigger, some are smaller.
    If you truly feel like it’s a mistake you can’t- or don’t want to get over and forgive, don’t even try. You’re going to torture only yourself and that other person.

EVERYTHING she has mentioned is as well extremely important. Like the ability to laugh and make other people laugh factor. Laughter is possibly the most effective way of just forgetting about a problem for a brief second. There is nothing more precious than when you’re crying and someone makes you laugh. Especially if you ‘don’t want to’. I’m just mentioning the few I felt kind of strongly about.
From the last lesson I mentioned, I realize there’s a hidden lesson inside there. Forgiving yourself. As well as you should forgive someone, you also need to know how to forgive yourself for some mistake you did.
Actually I’m lying, I didn’t realize it just now, I’ve always known it. I understand why it’s important.
I am a human being too that also makes mistakes. I understand that but It can’t happen on it’s own. I don’t work like that. I have to make up for it, otherwise it’ll be hanging over me until forever.
I know that’s not healthy and It’s actually sick that I realize it’s mentally crippling me, to the point of where I am bitter and angry with myself. Loathing myself from time to time.

I am nowhere near to finding and truly understanding myself and the world around me. I have my entire- literally entire life for that but I like to think that among the teenagers I see in my country, I’m not doing too bad.
I take a lot of pride in the fact that I don’t drink, smoke, party, date around, flirt. Heck, I’m scared to go out at night without a companion. Hormones did not overwhelm me and by the looks of it, they won’t. I am not an easily influenced person and even that aside- I don’t like to keep a group of people that could influence me into anything I wouldn’t find comfortable doing.
So far, I think I’m doing good.

My life is just starting. My roller coaster did not pass by much, but I’m along for the ride.
Well, most of the times.