It’s Never the Answer…

I truly feel like I need to talk about this topic, even though my eyes tear up, just at the thought.
Ever since the amazing Robin Williams passed away, a few days ago, large amounts of people have been having and stating some very strong and might I add, very judgmental thoughts on the issue – Suicide. One of these people include some of my friends that came to me to dig deeper in the subject. I’ll give you some of my personal thoughts on the issue…
*inhales*… This will be hard.

Most of my friends are religious. I can tell you that it’s quite frustrating at times, especially when it comes to these types of topics. They stated that, and not just Robin Williams, but all atheists or ‘non-believers’, however you want to label them, are set for doom because they don’t have God in their life and don’t worship something holy. That’s why they feel the need to commit suicide in the end.

First of all, religion shouldn’t have to affect this issue, one bit. It is unbelievably awful to state that because a man has different views on life rather than someone who is religious, is set for failure or by demand is a bad person or any less worthy than a ‘non-believer’. People need to realize this. This is a little off topic but my soul won’t rest if I don’t mention this.

Label’s don’t come in a package of good qualities. 
You need to realize, if you’re thinking like this, that just because you have the label “Religious”, – for whatever religion it may be – it does not make you by default a good person that God will let through his gates of heaven or guarantee you want good for people around you. In no way am I saying that you don’t if you are religious, but religion itself doesn’t guarantee anything. At any given time, there are bound to be religious people out there who are smarter than most atheists, OR atheists who are better people than most religious people.

I am getting in the topic of religion and i’ll stop myself here.

I know what it’s like. I know what it’s like feeling like there’s no purpose and nothing around feels worthy enough to try. It’s truly a dark and Real period, no one should judge.
I’ve read a few blogs on here that said suicide is absolutely selfish and you’re right. In sum it is, but you need to know what kind of pain it is.

You need to realize that someone is feeling enough amounts of pain and suffering to actually think nothing and no one is worth their time. It’s not an excuse. 
They truly feel so and that’s the scariest part in all of it. They need help from You to make them see otherwise.
My heart goes out to anyone who has been or is going through any kind of pain. If someone is even thinking of suicide, please, stop yourself and think.
Think about the pain one must feel deep inside to want to take their own life or harm themselves. Ask yourself why. If there’s anyone who’s reading this and has even remotely felt like this; Seek help, please… 

Reasons for depression go from simple family problems to problems as big as physical constant abuse, at any age and everything possible in between. Whatever the situation may be, there will always be someone that wants to help you. There will always be someone that would be just as lost and going through a dark time if you did something as permanent as taking your life.

Talk to someone, whoever you feel is safest. Be it a friend, your parents, a far relative, a counselor  at your school, ANYONE. My door and my arms are always open, for any of you and for anyone that may need help. You just shouldn’t keep it in because then, there is no one that can show you just how much you actually mean to someone in your life. It just keep piling up in your head and things are even harder to puzzle. There’s more things you can do that’ll help but being able to say what’s lies on your heart to someone is the first step.
Take a load off of your troubled heart, no matter how small it may be. It’s easier by that much.

Self harm is not the answer either. If you do that, I know you feel like you have some type of control over everything you feel… but that is not the way. It get’s better. It takes time and the hardest part is waiting, ’cause I know you feel like you’re waiting for nothing and no one. It always get’s better.
Once it does get better, you’ll have to live with the scars forever.

I feel like this post is so unorganized and I’m actually tearing up really bad while writing this. It’s a topic I’m battling till this day. But I  had to write it, because I can’t keep explaining to every individual separately that someone is truly hurting if they’re going through this.
It’s a serious issue that needs patience and time and love.

People are not sick, they’re not mentally challenged, they’re not idiots, they’re not stupid for thinking about these things. They’re just in pain, people need to understand that.
People deal with it differently.
You never need to see someone’s depressed. You don’t have to see one scar on their body, or one frown on their face. One can have the happiest time through the day, have a care-free day having fun, but you never know what’s going on behind their closed doors. Just how awful and worthless they feel at the end of each day. It’s not a cry you can hear at night.
One of the reasons you should NEVER judge the outside. You’ve never been through it before?
That’s EXACTLY why you shouldn’t judge. There’s more to people than what meets the eye. 

I’ve seen so many cases where people tried. Where people didn’t want to end their life or feel that bad. But to whoever they came to, mostly family, everyone told the person he’s crazy and needs medical attention for the insane. THAT’S NOT HELP!!!

You’re making it worse! Making them think there’s something truly wrong with them. You’re increasing their thoughts that their “insane self’ isn’t needed. Did you ever think of that…?
Of course not…

I got off track, but it breaks my heart. The picture is, Taking your life isn’t the answer. There’s always help, there’s good people around you. Don’t let your pain take control over your life and in the end consume it. There’s someone out there who wants to make you the happiest you can be.

This is not a topic I’ll talk about often, just now probably. It hurts way too much. The tears that have fallen through writing this, were genuine compassion for those in need. It’s not fair.
No one deserves it and no one is to blame for their own suffering.

5 thoughts on “It’s Never the Answer…

  1. So glad someone else believes religion has nothing to do with it. This past year a “friend” of mine told me everyday that “if I just loved God, I wouldn’t be sad anymore”. Those are two separate things. Completely. Ugh, he makes my blood boil every time I think about him.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s infuriating.
      What about religious people, people who go to visit church and pray? A big number of religious people went through depression and might I add suicidal thoughts.
      What then?
      They loved God, but God then didn’t like they were thinking that way because the body was his gift? So he PUNISHED them, by not helping and not loving them back?
      Any sense? Anyone? No.
      Religion itself is one selfish thing, ugh.

      Like

  2. This is a topic that I have started to care about alot lately..
    This was a lovely written post and it really got to me..
    I won’t be able to describe what I really wanted to because of some resons irl.. but i will try my best

    I have friends that have been depressed/suicidal and still is and I do everything i can to be there for them because I would be devestated if something happend to them.
    And when I read about Robin William’s death I didnt want to belive it.. I denied it untill I got the same information from 10 sites.. To me he was one of the greatest actors, his voice was so incredibly soothing, he had passion and he could really play all sorts of roles. So R.I.P Robin, you will always be missed.. ❤
    But to the topic, he took sucide. And for many people I see comments like "How could a funny and cheerful guy like him take suicide?". Well he was depressed and had alot of mental struggles, he tried to get help but in the end… he felt like there was no other alternative and that is horrible.

    Unfortunatley some people don't take depression seriously, but in my opinion its one of the worst "illness" you can get.
    But as this post said, we have to help those who really needs it. Shrugging them off will just make it worse.

    One of my depressed/suicidal friends linked this to me after Robin died and it is so deep and I think it should be spread: https://medium.com/the-nib/i-want-to-live-6a40fbc76ef4

    This comment wasnt as I planned as I said, but i hope my point was in there.
    And thanks again for such a beautiful writtten and meaningful post Marija!

    Liked by 1 person

I'd love to hear what you have to say!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s